The deadly Digital Camera Hoax Virus Infestation Plague Conspiracy has struck again at the Meme And Mime Show in Montmartre. Thousands of dismembered bodies have been dragged out of what has been described as the worst scenes of carnage since the St. Bartholomew’s Day Massacres in the 16th century. Ambulances are arriving non-stop to remove the corpses before they turn into zombies and begin to prey upon the citizens of Paris.
Spokesmen for the Association Theatrique de France say this is the result of a massive fraud perpetrated upon the readers of weblog columns by unscrupulous writers trying to cash in on the public’s desire for fear and sensation. It will have profound effect upon the confidence and viability of the European camera makers – Leica is said to be closing all of its plants on the Ivory Coast and on Pitcairn Island. Samsung has declined to answer the phone, though rumours have it that this is just the result of a burned ear.
It is too early to tell whether the piles of rotting corpses strewing central Paris will affect Brexit or the tourist season. Neither Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton could be contacted for comment because no-one wanted to talk to them. Ever. Again.